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Funny Quotes On Drinking Alcohol, Having Fun, And Partying

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Sometimes, we get so drunk that it will make us in an unconscious state. We laugh without even a reason and want to say something funny but the beer makes your mind freeze and you are not able to think of anything. So, if you are looking for some funny quotes on drinking alcohol, having fun, and partying, then explore these quotes and remind yourself of what it is like to get drunk a little too much.

  • To me ‘Drink responsibly’ means don’t spill it.
  • I hate when people say that you don’t need alcohol to have fun. Well, you don’t need running shoes to run but it helps.
  • Beer doesn’t have many vitamins. That’s why you need to drink lots of it.
  • I drink alcohol to drown my problems, unfortunately, my problems are damn good swimmers.
  • Not to get technical but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.
  • Save the earth, it’s the only planet with beer.
  • Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.
  • When you accidentally pour too much alcohol into your mixed drink and you have to just deal with it because your mother didn’t raise a quitter.
  • The best beer is an open beer.
  • My tolerance for alcohol is way higher than my tolerance for people.
  • My doctor told me to watch my drinking, so I’m off to find a bar with a mirror.
  • You say alcoholism, I say liver CrossFit.
  • Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says to love your enemy.
  • Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol.
  • Alcohol may not solve your problems, but neither will water or milk.
  • When I drink alcohol, everyone says I’m an alcoholic. But when I drink Fanta, no one says I’m fantastic.
  • Alcohol is not the answer. Alcohol is the question. Yes is the answer.
  • Alcohol – Because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.
  • Always buy a bigger bottle than you think you’ll need. Better to be safe than sober.
  • They say so many people die because of alcohol. Ironically, they never realized how many of them are born because of it.
  • Vodka may not be the answer but it’s worth a shot.
  • Because alcohol tastes better than tears.
  • Home is where the wine is.
  • And then alcohol said, “Put that one on Facebook, it’s hilarious”. But alcohol was wrong. So very wrong.
  • A party without alcohol is just a meeting.

Funny Drinking Quotes

We all know that every party and event is incomplete without Alcohol. We all know that it is not good for health but now it’s an essential thing while celebrating something. So if you are at a party and want to share your photo with a wine glass on social media then caption that photo with these funny drinking quotes.

  • They say follow your heart and it led me to alcohol.
  • I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink two times a year. On my birthday, and when it’s not my birthday.
  • Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver.
  • May you always have love in your heart and beer in your belly.
  • Warning! Drinking alcoholic beverages before pregnancy can cause pregnancy.
  • According to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.
  • I read an article that said if you drink every day you might be an alcoholic… thank God I only drink every night.
  • Drinking is not a solution unless we’re talking about alcohol.
  • Every loaf of bread is a tragic story of a group of grains that could have become beer but didn’t.
  • Of course size matters. No one wants a small glass of wine.
  • In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, and in the water there are bacteria.
  • You put the fun in functioning alcoholics.
  • Dear Alcohol, we had a deal that you would make me prettier, funnier, and a better dancer. I saw the video, we need to talk.
  • Friday is the beginning of my liver’s workweek.
  • Alcohol is a perfect solvent, it dissolves marriages, families, and careers.
  • I used to think drinking was bad for me… so I gave up thinking.
  • They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who’s in a hurry?
  • Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life’s problems.
  • I know I should give up drinking but I am not a quitter.
  • I drink wine because my doctor said I shouldn’t keep things bottled up.
  • Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
  • If smokers can have smoking breaks, why can’t I have drinking breaks?
  • Alcohol helps me listen to your bullshit and pretend to believe it.
  • I finally quit drinking for good. Now I drink for evil.
  • My doctor told me to watch my drinking, so I’m off to find a bar with a mirror.

Short Funny Drinking Quotes

It’s one of the best times to record funny videos for your drunk friend and share them on social media platforms. Explore these short funny drinking quotes and caption the funny video of your drunk friend who is on diet. We hope you’ll find the words that will describe your video in words too.

  • When I drink alcohol, everyone says I’m an alcoholic. When I drink Fanta no one says I’m fantastic.
  • Tonight i will be having my favorite drink. It is called a lot.
  • I said no to alcohol, but it just doesn’t listen.
  • Don’t drink to forget me. You’ll end up seeing me double.
  • I have a feeling my check liver light may come on this weekend.
  • I drink to make other people more interesting.
  • Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  • I used to think drinking was bad for me… so i gave up thinking.
  • I give into beer pressure.
  • A man’s true character comes out when he’s drunk.
  • Not to get technical… but according to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.
  • You bring the alcohol, I’ll bring the bad decision.
  • I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
  • Life is better when you are drunk.
  • Alcohol won’t solve your problems. Then again, neither will milk.
  • Today I was a hero, I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle.
  • There are two types of people in this world; people you want to drink with and people who make you want to drink.
  • It’s not drinking alone if your dog is home.
  • Save water drink beer.
  • I quit drinking yesterday, but tonight… I celebrate my comeback!
  • He was a wise man who invented beer.
  • Religions change, but beer and wine remain. 
  • Fermentation may have been a better invention than fire.
  • Anyone can drink beer, but it takes intelligence to enjoy beer.
  • I am very picky about my people and my beer.

Famous Funny Beer Quotes

We have collected the famous funny beer quotes and sayings, and hilarious alcohol quotes for you to enjoy the funny moments after getting drunk. Eating healthily and drink having a beer is just an explosive combination. Explore and share them with your friends to make them also laugh.

  • Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same.
  • A bottle of beer contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.
  • A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food.
  • A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it’s better to be thoroughly sure.
  • I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer.
  • There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking.
  • A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.
  • I’m not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.
  • I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
  • You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.
  • The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night drop them off at the wrong house.
  • I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking a beer.
  • Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
  • A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you’d step over your own mother just to get one!
  • I’ve only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror.

Top Funny Beer Quotes

  • Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
  • Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
  • Drinking beer doesn’t make you fat, it makes you lean…Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.
  • Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
  • When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.
  • Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.
  • Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution!
  • Beer, if drank in moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit, and promotes health.
  • I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.
  • I feel sorry for people who do not have a Bible to lean on.
  • I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
  • I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had lost exactly two weeks.
  • Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
  • Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine.
  • I drink to make other people interesting.
  • Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.
  • You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.
  • When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let’s all get drunk and go to heaven!
  • I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night.
  • Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.
  • Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today.
  • You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer.
  • Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
  • I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.
  • No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed beef and beer.

Healthy Eating Quotes, Diet Quotes

More Funny and Laughable Drinking Quotes

  • A quart of ale is a dish for a king.
  • Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my scotch, I say, I’m thirsty, not dirty.
  • You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
  • I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day.
  • I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.
  • An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
  • Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
  • If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don’t actually live longer; it just seems longer.
  • Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
  • I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won’t let himself get snotty about it.
  • Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.
  • Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.
  • It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
  • The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
  • Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself pleasure.
  • I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
  • You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
  • If you drink don’t drive. Don’t even put.
  • Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
  • An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.
  • The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.
  • What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
  • The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.
  • Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.
  • When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
  • Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.
  • I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.
  • Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer!
  • He that drinks fast, pays slow.
  • Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
  • There can’t be good living where there is not good drinking.
  • Paintings are like beer, only beer tastes good and it’s hard to stop drinking beer.
  • An oppressive government is more to be feared than a tiger.
  • Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working.
  • I once shook hands with Pat Boone, and my whole right side sobered up!
  • Let us drink for the replenishment of our strength, not for our sorrow.
  • One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
  • Beer is living proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy.
  • Whoever invented beer is a wise man.
  • I would kill everyone in the room just for one drop of just drop of quality beer.
  • No doubt, beer is the greatest invention in the entire history of mankind. The wheel was also a great invention, but it does not go nearly as well with pizza as beer.
  • 24 hours a day and 24 beers in a case equal coincidence.
  • Since everybody has to believe in something, I believe I’ll get another drink.
  • May your glass always be full, and the roof over your head always be strong. And may you be in heaven for half an hour before the devil realizes that you’re dead.
  • An intelligent man is sometimes forced to drink in order to spend time with fools.
  • Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than what alcohol has taken out of me.
  • Beer is the cause and solution of all the problems of life.
  • God made years and dough and loves fermentation just as he loves vegetation.
  • A quart of ale is enough meal for a King.
  • You cannot be a real country minus beer and an airline.
  • Do what you said you’d do drunk when you are sober, it will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
  • A woman drove me to drink yet I didn’t have the audacity to thank her.
  • Beauty is in the hands of the beer holder.
  • Not all chemicals are harmful. Without hydrogen and oxygen, which are chemicals, there would be no water, which is a vital ingredient in beer.
  • A non-drinker is a weak person, who succumbs to and yields to the lure of denying himself a pleasure.
  • Women are like beer, they look and smell good, and you would step over your mother just to get one.
  • Apparently, beer contains the hormones of a woman, once you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut up.
  • Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver.
  • Alcohol Goes In, Happiness Comes Out.
  • I drink on Sundays to cope with the realization that I’m almost out of time to drink.
  • I should start drinking on Monday. To get prepared for the weekend.
  • My only interests are drinking wine and judging others.
  • Fuck it… I’m day drinking.
  • I hate it when I’m drinking and somebody tries to correct my vocabulary.
  • A drink a day keeps the shrink away.
  • I quit drinking yesterday but tonight… I celebrate my comeback!
  • Old and tired but down to day drink.
  • May you have enough wine to make it through your kid’s snow day.
  • Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
  • I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
  • A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.
  • I’m not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings, I’m a drunk, we go to parties.
  • I don’t drink alcohol. I drink distilled spirites. So I’m not an alcoholic I’m spiritual.
  • I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
  • Friendships must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness, and shenanigans.
  • You are only as the alcohol you drink the tables you dance on and the friends that hold you together.
  • Step aside coffee. This is a job for alcohol.
  • I drink alcohol to drown my problems. Unfortunately, problems are damn good simmers.
  • An alcoholic is anyone you don’t like who drinks more than you do.
  • Alcohol is not the answer it just makes you forget the question.
  • I’m not an alcoholic, alcoholic’s need a drink. I have one!
  • I don’t like the term alcoholic I prefer it.
  • You bring the alcohol, I’ll bring the bad decision.
  • I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
  • I’m not an alcoholic, i only drink two times a year. On my birthday, and when its not my birthday.
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